Life Is a Vapor, But Then What?

Posted on October 6, 2009 by russellmckinney

I got the call yesterday morning that a faithful member of our church passed away during the night. What made the news so shocking was the fact that Bill had seemed fine Sunday morning. He and his wife, Celeine, had taken their usual seats in church and enjoyed the service just like they always did.

I myself wasn’t fine that Sunday morning, and Bill picked up on it as soon as he saw me. For various reasons, I didn’t sleep well that Saturday night. Then, I got up Sunday morning with a fair amount of vertigo. That was only the second time in my life I experienced vertigo (and I don’t want there to ever be a third). As I walked into church that morning, I put up a brave front and figured that nobody would be able to tell that I was struggling a little just to remain upright. But when I walked over to shake hands with Bill and Celeine, Bill looked right at me and said, “You’re sick.” I’ve got to admit that I was taken aback by the straightforwardness of his remark and the accuracy of his diagnosis.

After I explained to him what was going on with me, he asked me something I will never forget. His question was, “When was the last time you had a physical?” I stuttered and stammered a little and then finally got out the answer, “Oh, I don’t know, I guess it was five or so years ago.” The truth was, I couldn’t remember. Bill’s reply was, “You ought to go have one. You might have some high blood pressure.” (For the record, I’ve had my blood pressure checked in the past few months. It was fine.)

After the Sunday service, I got involved talking to other people and didn’t really say much to Bill and Celeine. I regret that now. If I had known that was the last time I would see Bill on this earth, I would have made a point of spending a lot of time with him. But we never know such things, do we? Life really is “a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes away” (James 4:14).

We don’t know exactly what took Bill’s life around 1:00 a.m. Monday morning. He lived each day with a garden variety of physical ailments. I can’t even begin to remember the number of hospital stays he endured, the surgeries and the procedures. At his home yesterday afternoon, the family showed me the list of medications he took. It looked like an encyclopedia of Latin. He had to have a chart just to keep it all straight. I think that’s why he encouraged me to get a physical. He knew far better than most how quickly your health can deteriorate.

I took great joy in informing the family that Bill no longer needs all his pills or his oxygen machine. His soul has now departed (Genesis 35:18-19) from his “body of death” (Romans 7:24). I’m happy for him. I’m also a little envious. I’ve noticed that something strange has happened to me over the past few years. I’ve begun longing for heaven to a degree I didn’t expect to reach until I was much older.

And here’s the shocking thing (at least it’s shocking to me): My increased longing for heaven springs much more from a desire to leave behind the pain, suffering, injustice, and wickedness of this world than it does a desire to see the splendors of heaven. I’ve begun to see heaven not so much as a desirable location but as an escape from an undesirable one. I’m as excited about getting to leave this world as I am about getting to enter into heaven.

Do I still love my wife and want to spend our “golden years” together? Yes. Do I still love my two boys and want to watch them finish growing up? Yes. Do I want to hold grandbabies in my arms and get to spoil them? Yes. Do I want to keep on enjoying all the pleasures of life? Yes. But do I now see this life for what it is and look forward to a better afterlife? Most definitely! I think it’s quite appropriate that the text God has given me for Bill’s funeral sermon is Job 14:1-6, a passage which begins with the words: “Man who is born of woman is of few days and full of trouble.”

Bill is out of that trouble now. He is in that better place that we like to talk about. But his is only a better place because he knew Jesus as his personal Savior. Can you imagine how awful it would be if this life was the highlight of your eternal existence? Can you imagine being born of woman, living out your “few” days (few in relation to eternity), experiencing all of life’s trouble, and then having your soul depart for a gruesome place of suffering and anguish? Can you imagine lifting up your eyes in hell and being in torment (Luke 16:19-23)? I don’t even want to think about such a horror.

But the stark reality is that most of the people on earth right now are staring straight down the gun-barrel of that horror. They don’t know Christ as Savior and if they die tonight their souls will not go to heaven. This should compel us Christians to be all the more involved in evangelism. We must share the good news of Christ’s gospel with those who need it. Someone once shared that gospel with Bill, and he responded by placing his belief in Jesus as his personal Savior. For that reason, I won’t have problems preaching his funeral and his family won’t have to search fruitlessly for comfort. But that puts us in the minority, not the majority. And that, Christian, is not a good thing.

You say, “But Russell, I’m just one person and the task of world evangelism is far too overwhelming.” You’re right, it is. That’s why Jesus doesn’t expect you to take on that task. What He expects you to do is engage in individual evangelism. Don’t focus on winning the masses of China to Christ. Focus on that one person the Lord puts right in front of you today. You know the one, the one with your name on them.

Maybe the person is a family member. Maybe the person is a friend. Maybe the person is a coworker. Maybe the person is a neighbor. Maybe the person is a fellow parent from your kid’s ball team. What I’m saying is, door-to-door evangelism to rank strangers has its place, but so does relational evangelism to people you already know.

You see, the fact is, some “Bills” will die tonight, and one of them might just be a lost person you know. That person needs Christ, which means that he or she needs you to tell them about Him. Stop talking about politics, the weather, the economy, or the ball game, and press on into spiritual matters, eternal matters. Be tactful, but get the conversation there. Tell that person about Jesus.

If you don’t feel comfortable quoting scripture, at least tell the person what Jesus has done for you. Talk about the trouble you’ve experienced in this world and then talk about heaven. Make a point of explaining that you are guaranteed heaven only because Jesus died on the cross for your sins and you have believed in Him as Savior. You don’t have to hold an evangelistic crusade. You don’t have to try to be someone you’re not. But you do need to be a witness who’s trying. And don’t worry about how the person responds to what you say. That’s not your department. Your job is simply the telling.

I will miss my friend Bill, but I know his soul now resides in heaven’s glory. He has been reunited with Christian loved ones who passed on before him. Most importantly, he now sees Jesus face to face. That Savior that he only knew by faith he now knows by personal appearance. That’s a joy that everyone should get to experience. I realize that’s not going to happen, but you and I can help it happen for some folks if we will open up our closed lips and share the gospel.

Posted in Adversity, Belief, Christ's Death, Coming Judgment, Death, Evangelism, Heaven, Hell, Salvation, Trials, Witnessing | Tagged , , , , , , | 1 Comment

The Christian as a Teacher

Posted on September 29, 2009 by russellmckinney

Allow me to offer three illustrations that involve teaching. Teaching, of course, can be a wonderful thing that produces desirable results. As we will see with each of these illustrations, however, sometimes the whole process can turn sideways in a hurry.

Illustration #1: A man was attempting to house train his dog. Every time the dog made a mess in the house, he threw the dog out the window as punishment. After about three weeks, someone asked the man how the training was coming along. He said, “That dumb dog – now every time he makes a mess he finishes up by jumping out the window.”

Illustration #2: A teenage girl took first-aid training. A few days later she burst into the house and said, “Mother, I just saw a terrible accident and I used my first-aid training.” The proud mother, with visions of her daughter heroically giving someone mouth-to-mouth resuscitation, said, “Oh, honey, that’s wonderful. What did you do?” The girl said, “When I saw the blood, I sat down and put my head between my knees so I wouldn’t pass out.”

Illustration #3: The starting quarterback on the high school team got injured and the team had to send in an untested freshman to replace him. Normally, the freshman was the team’s punter. Since the coach didn’t trust the freshman to run the offense, he said to the kid, “Just hand the ball off to Jones, our big fullback, for three plays and then punt.” The freshman said, “Got it, coach” and ran onto the field.

On the first play, Jones ripped off a long run. The hometown crowd roared. The next play Jones rumbled for another big chunk of yards. The crowd roared again. The next play Jones ran the ball all the way down inside the one yard line, just inches away from a touchdown. The crowd went into a frenzy.

Then the team lined up for the next play. The freshman quarterback took the snap, dropped back a couple of yards, and punted the ball completely through the end-zone, far up into the stands. As the team came off the field, the incensed coach grabbed the young quarterback and screamed, “What in the world were you thinking when you punted that ball?” The youngster said, “I was thinking, ‘we sure do have a dumb coach.'”

Teaching gets trying at times, doesn’t it? But let’s keep at it, especially in the realm of Christian teaching. As Solomon attempted to teach his son, Rehoboam, about the dangers of adultery, he told him to obey his words so that the young man wouldn’t have to admit to a certain truth about himself. What was that truth? Solomon didn’t want Rehoboam to have to say, “How I have hated instruction, and my heart despised correction! I have not obeyed the voice of my teachers, nor inclined my ear to those who instructed me! I was on the verge of total ruin…” (Proverbs 5:12-14, N.K.J.V.). You see, right there is the highest motivation for Christian teaching. The Christian teaches for the purpose of keeping someone from total ruin.

There is a debate as to who wrote the Bible’s book of Hebrews. Whoever it was, though, wrote under the inspiration of God (2 Timothy 3:16), and in Hebrews 5:12 he rebukes the Jewish Christians to whom he is writing. And what does he rebuke them for? He rebukes them for not being spiritually far enough along to be TEACHERS of the word of God. Obviously, those Christians had been saved long enough to have become capable of teaching God’s word, but they hadn’t done their “learning” and therefore still needed to be taught themselves.

Whatever else we might say about that verse, it certainly proves that God wants Christians to be teachers of His word. This doesn’t mean that it’s His will for every Christian to be a pastor, Sunday School teacher, missionary, theologian, or seminary professor. It does mean, though, that each Christian should be doing his or her part to instruct others in what “Thus saith the Lord.”

So, how are you doing on that, Christian? Can you effectively weave the teachings of God’s word into everyday conversations? Are you a veritable well of scriptural instruction to your friends, acquaintances, and coworkers? If you have children, do you make a point of telling them what the Bible says about controversial issues? I hope you will agree with me that your answer to each of these questions should be: yes. And in case you are wondering why this is such a big deal, let me remind you that God just might want to use your teaching to save someone from spiritual ruin.

Posted in Bible Study, Children, Influence, Parenting, Scripture, Teaching, The Bible | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

A Prayer Worth Praying

Posted on September 25, 2009 by russellmckinney

My friend Malcolm Woody once sent me an e-mail that included an awesome prayer. The prayer came from John Baillie, the Scottish theologian who wrote the classic book A Diary of Private Prayer. The prayer goes like this:

Teach me, O’ God, to use all the circumstances of my life today that they may bring forth in me the fruits of holiness rather than the fruits of sin.

Let me use disappointment as material for patience.

Let me use success as material for thankfulness.

Let me use trouble as material for perseverance.

Let me use danger as material for courage.

Let me use reproach as material for longsuffering.

Let me use praise as material for humility.

Let me use pleasures as material for temperance.

Let me use pain as material for endurance.

The idea behind this prayer is that everything that life brings our way can be harnessed and used in God’s service. There is no circumstance that can’t be redeemed. Good days, bad days, ups, downs, joys, and heartbreaks can all produce what Baillie calls “the fruits of holiness.”

Romans 8:28-29 says:

And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose. For whom He foreknew, He also predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son, that He might be the firstborn among many brethren. (N.K.J.V., emphasis mine)

Those verses mean that God doesn’t waste anything. He repurposes all things (disappointment, success, trouble, danger, reproach, praise, pleasures, pain, etc.) by making them work together for a very specific type of good in the life of the Christian. And what is that specific type of good? It is the conforming of the Christian to the image of Christ.

You see, a life filled with nothing but disappointment will conform a Christian to some of the image of Christ but not all of it. Likewise, a life filled with nothing but success will conform a Christian to some of the image of Christ but not all of it. It really does take the whole gamut of human experiences to conform a Christian to the complete image of the Savior.

Someone once asked a certain Christian, “Why do you work so hard at trying to be like Jesus?” The Christian answered, “When I get to heaven I will at last be made completely like Him, and I don’t want the change to be such a shock to my system.” That’s the idea! The more we are conformed to Christ’s image in this life the less radical the completion of the conformation will be in the afterlife.

And how do we become more and more conformed to that image in this life? We allow God to use ALL of life’s varied circumstances to mold and shape us. That’s why John Baillie’s prayer is so worth praying. So, Christian, why not pray it today? Better yet, why not make it a part of your daily praying? After all, it’s really not all that hard to memorize, and it will help you to truly grab hold of the teaching of Romans 8:28-29.

Posted in Adversity, Courage, Disappointment, Fear, God's Sovereignty, Humility, Loneliness, Persecution, Perseverance, Personal Holiness, Prayer, Problems, Sanctification, Sickness, Suffering, Trials, Trusting In God, Waiting | Tagged , , , , , | 1 Comment

Sin & Church Attendance

Posted on September 22, 2009 by russellmckinney

Can you imagine getting drunk Saturday night and then going to church the next morning? Can you imagine rolling out of a bed you share with your live-in lover, getting dressed, and going to church? Can you imagine having beer on your breath as you attend a church service? Can you imagine not paying a bill you owe and then trying to worship with the person to whom you owe it?

As a pastor, I’ve seen professing Christians do these things. Each time I was left to wonder about the mentality that could create such behavior. I’m sure that Ananias and Sapphira would have some thoughts on this subject. They lied about their level of commitment to the Lord and were struck dead after bringing their offering to the apostles (Acts 5:1-11). Nadab and Abihu would have some thoughts, too. They were devoured in flames as they attempted to perform their priestly duties while under the influence of alcohol (Leviticus 10:1-11).

The hard, cold truth is that if God still imposed such high standards for worship, we’d be seeing a lot of funerals in our churches today. The current status quo reminds me of the worshipers of Amos’ time. Even though the northern kingdom of Israel was wicked to the core, the citizens were still faithfully attending their supposed “worship” services at Bethel and Gilgal. Amos sarcastically mocked these services by saying, “Come to Bethel and transgress. At Gilgal, multiply transgression” (Amos 4:4).

Far too many Christians seem to have the idea that sprinkling church attendance onto their sins makes those sins more acceptable. Do they not realize that a rotten egg is still a rotten egg no matter how much sugar you pour on it? Going to church might ease your conscience a little and make you feel better about yourself, but it won’t impress God. You can attend a hundred different services in a hundred different churches and still not do any substantive business with Him until you repent of the sins that characterize your life Monday through Saturday.

1 Samuel chapter 15 will preach. That chapter records how God spoke through the prophet Samuel, commanding King Saul to utterly destroy the Amalekites. That meant that every Amalekite man, woman, child, ox, sheep, camel, and donkey was to be put to death. Saul, however, didn’t fully carry out that command. Instead, he took Amalek’s king as a prisoner of war and spared the best of the sheep, oxen, fatlings, and lambs.

Samuel went out to see Saul, and Saul boasted to him, “I have performed the commandment of the Lord.” With words dripping of sarcasm, Samuel responded, “What then is this bleating of the sheep in my ears and the lowing of oxen which I hear?” When Saul explained that he planned to offer the animals as sacrifices to God, Samuel told him, “Has the Lord as great delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices as in obeying the voice of the Lord? Behold, to obey is better than to sacrifice, and to heed than the fat of rams.”

Samuel was teaching Saul that no amount of “worship” can make up for rank disobedience. You can “play church” all you want, but God will never ignore the fact that He hears the bleating of sheep and the lowing of oxen in your life. As Saul described the spectacular sacrifices he was planning to offer up as “worship,” Samuel might as well have said to him, “I’m sorry, I can’t hear you because the fruits of your disobedience are drowning out your voice.”

1 Peter 4:17 says: “For the time has come for judgment to begin at the house of God…” Peter wrote those God-inspired words sometime between A.D. 63-65, which is over nineteen centuries ago. Needless to say, if he could truthfully make that statement in his day, how much more can we make it today?

Tragically, our churches have become infected with what has been called (at best) “casual Christianity” and (at worst) “sloppy grace.” Additionally, this problem is compounded by the fact that we live in terror that people will quit church if we rebuke them over their sinful behavior. That’s why we acceptingly wink at all kinds of blatant sin.

Our acceptance of these sins, however, kills our credibility with lost people. You see, lost people instinctively understand that professing Christians should conduct themselves in a manner that bears a fair degree of resemblance to the personal holiness that marked Jesus’ life. Consequently, when even they can look at our lives and recognize that we have far too much bleating of sheep and lowing of oxen about us, why should they show an interest in accepting the Savior whom we call “Lord”? After all, if He can’t clean up our lives by helping us repent of our sinfulness, who’s to say that He will do any better with their lives?

Posted in Backsliding, Character, Church, Church Attendance, Discipleship, Disobedience, Doing Good, Faithfulness, Holiness, Obedience, Personal Holiness, Repentance, Sanctification, Sin, Worship | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Temptation’s Wreckers

Posted on September 17, 2009 by russellmckinney

As a lifelong resident of North Carolina, I’m interested in historical tidbits of information about my state. Somewhere along the way, I picked up an old legend about Nags Head, a town located on the Outer Banks of eastern North Carolina. This legend has never been officially verified, but it sure makes for a good story.

The legend has it that in the 1700s Nags Head was home to a group of ruthless land pirates known as “wreckers” (sometimes also called “bankers”). These men would hang lanterns around the necks of “nags” (horses or mules) and slowly walk the animals up and down the beach at night. Out in the darkness of the Atlantic ocean, a ship would mistake the bobbing light for the light of another ship. Figuring the other ship had found safe passage around the dangerous shoals just off the island, the ship in the darkness would turn inland and run aground on Diamond Shoals.

In the mornings, the “wreckers” would walk along the shoreline to gather up whatever timber or other goods the tide had brought in from the wrecked ships. The found loot was then sold for profit. Even now visitors to Nags Head are shown old houses that were supposedly built and furnished with material taken from these shipwrecks, and the assumption is that Nags Head got its name from the practice of the land pirates hanging the lanterns around the necks of the nags. Estimates say that over 2,000 ships perished off this coast during that time period, with many of the shipwrecks being ships that were fooled by the “wreckers.”

Nags Head is now a tourist town of around 2,700. If it ever was a haven for land pirates, those days are long gone. This doesn’t mean, though, that there aren’t still some “wreckers” out there that need to be avoided. A “wrecker” is anyone or anything that causes another to sail into dangerous waters. For example, a seductive man or woman can wreck a marriage, a bottle of booze can wreck a life, a dirty business deal can wreck a career, and a church leader who doesn’t follow the Lord can wreck a church.

The key to avoiding a “shipwreck” is to accurately recognize a wrecker for who or what it is. Don’t fall for just any old light on a dark night. Don’t be misled by a false reality. Don’t be so quick to trade the known for the unknown.

Most of us have heard the saying, “God won’t put more on you than you can handle.” Even though this saying’s principle is a sound one, there is no Bible verse that specifically supports it. The verse in question actually has to do with temptation. It is 1 Corinthians 10:13, which says:

No temptation has overtaken you except such as is common to man; but God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will also make the way of escape, that you may be able to bear it. (N.K.J.V.)

Please note the teaching of this verse. God will never allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able to withstand. To the contrary, whenever you get close to your breaking point, He will provide you with an escape hatch out of that temptation. His job is to provide the way of escape, and your job is to use it.

I don’t know what’s going on in your life right now, but could it be that you are considering sailing off toward some strange light? Are you just about to change your course in life simply because you think this light will lead you into safe waters? Friend, beware of the wrecker! If God really wanted you to chart that course, the way would be much clearer and more sure. The night wouldn’t be so dark, and the light wouldn’t be so questionable. Therefore, rather than turning yourself toward that light, you need to start looking around for God’s way of escape from that temptation. Based upon 1 Corinthians 10:13, that way will be there, and if you use it, you will be spared a disastrous shipwreck.

Posted in Adversity, Change, Choices, Contentment, Deception, Decisions, Discernment, God's Will, Greed, Lust, Problems, Temptation, Trials | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

“Lord, Send Us Rattlesnakes”

Posted on September 15, 2009 by russellmckinney

Once upon a time there was a family of backslidden church members. The family consisted of a father and three sons. They had all once been very active in church but lately had fallen away completely.

Many people visited the family and asked them to come back to church. That list of visitors included not only the pastor but also the deacons. Unfortunately, however, all the visiting, counseling, encouraging, and rebuking produced no effect upon either the father or any of the three sons.

One day when the sons were working in the field, a big rattlesnake raised up and bit the middle son. The boy became very sick, and the doctor was called. The doctor did what he could, but the prognosis was not good. He said, “About all we can do now is pray for this young man.”

Those words sent the father into enough of a panic to call the pastor. The pastor immediately went out to the home and was informed of the desperate situation. The father said, “Please, pastor, we need you to pray.” The pastor said, “Very well” and then started his prayer.

He prayed, “Oh wise and all-knowing Father, we thank thee for Thou hast sent this rattlesnake to bite this young man in order to bring him to his senses. He has not been inside the church house for a long time now, and it is doubtful that he has in all that time felt the need for prayer. Now we trust that this will prove a valuable lesson to him and that it will lead to genuine repentance.”

As the father and the other two sons listened to the pastor’s prayer, they were surprised by the bluntness of it. What they didn’t know was that the pastor was about to get even more blunt. He continued praying, saying, “And now, Father, wilt thou send another snake to bite the older son, another to bite the younger son, and another BIG ONE to bite this father. For we have all been doing everything we know for some time now to restore them to the fellowship of the church, but it’s been to no avail. It seems, therefore, that all of our combined efforts could not do what this snake has done. We thus conclude that the only thing left that will do this family any good is rattlesnakes. So, Lord, send us bigger and better rattlesnakes! In the name of Jesus I pray. Amen.”

People often ask, “Why does God allow His people to suffer?” Well, sometimes He does it as a form of chastisement. As the Psalmist says in Psalm 119:67, “Before I was afflicted I went astray, but now I keep Your word.” Likewise, Hebrews 12:8 says that if we are without chastisement, we are not true children of God.

No loving, right-thinking parent enjoys disciplining a child. We’d much rather see our kids display obedience. But the plain truth is, sometimes kids disobey, and that disobedience must bring painful consequences. If it doesn’t, what’s the incentive for obedience? God understands this better than we do, and that’s why He is in the business of disciplining His children.

Tell me, are you at a loss as to how to pray for a wayward Christian? Is there someone close to you who is legitimately saved but just as legitimately backslidden? If you have such a person in your life, do you love them enough to pray for God to send some “rattlesnake” to afflict them? Obviously, we’re talking about the final card in the deck here, a “last straw” request, tough love administered to a sizable degree. Nevertheless, such chastisement is necessary in extreme cases. You see, as unsettling as it is for us to contemplate, sometimes it takes a “rattlesnake” to get a person’s attention and bring them back to God.

Posted in Adversity, Backsliding, Church Attendance, Discipline, Disobedience, Obedience, Parenting, Personal Holiness, Prayer Requests, Rebellion, Repentance, Sin | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Idolatry in Early Bloom (A Word About Youth Sports)

Posted on September 11, 2009 by russellmckinney

When you are the parent of a child involved in youth sports, you know more than you want to know about gyms, football fields, baseball diamonds, and soccer fields. You know how time consuming those places are. You know how much gas it takes to get to them. You know how much it costs for your kid to not only be there but be wearing the cool garb all the other kids are wearing. Your life is not your own. You lost it all over again when they handed you the latest schedule. Of course, it’s been so long since you had it, you barely remember those days anyway.

A Christian with any degree of spiritual discernment can understand that college sports and professional sports have reached the status of idolatry in this country. But what many don’t understand is just how far down into the age brackets the idolatry has worked itself. A World Series in which the President throws out the first pitch and each player on the field is a millionaire is just the tip of the iceberg. A Super Bowl that offers Bruce Springsteen as halftime entertainment doesn’t paint the full picture. Neither does a Final Four where hundreds of fans have spent a couple weeks worth of paychecks just to sit in the nosebleed section of a dome and watch the games on a big screen. The fact is, the idolatry is in early bloom all the way down into the youth leagues.

The same parent who doesn’t mind calling in sick for work over a mere sniffle turns into Indiana Jones to get a kid to a game early Saturday morning. “Here’s your assignment, Dr. Jones, should you choose to accept it: Drag your child out of bed over protest (no bullwhip, please), get a uniform on the deadhead, grab a few Pop Tarts (the real breakfast of champions) on your way out the door, climb into the family truckster, exceed the speed limit, commit at least two cases of road rage, get to the site one minute after you were supposed to be there, watch the game and see your kid not do what he has been coached to do, drive back home as you fuss at the kid for not doing what he has been coached to do, and then spend the rest of your Saturday collapsed around the house trying to recover from the assignment.” Any takers? The hands of parents go up all over the countryside.

You say you are up for a sequel? Fine, let’s toss around a few more ideas. We could have Indy be forced to hunt down and buy a new, expensive football helmet because the one they gave his kid for standard issue looks like something Dick Butkus turned in at the end of the 1967 Chicago Bears season. Or we could have the coach of Indy’s kid suggest that Indy buy a lighter bat for the kid because the team only has three bats and none of them is light enough. And then, after Indy has shelled out $250 for the new bat, we’ll have three or four other kids on the team want to use it. Now we’re talking! And Indy will have to teach his child the lesson of sharing with those who haven’t contributed one dime to the cause.

If I sound like I have an intimate knowledge of youth sports, it’s because for years Tonya and I moved through our calendar year by rotating from one youth sport to the next. In the spring and summer, it was baseball. In the fall, it was soccer or football. In the winter, it was basketball. I was a head coach and an assistant coach. I was a parent and a fan. I experienced everything from recreation league teams to travel teams to middle school teams to high school teams. One of my sons even played some college baseball. And what did all of my experience teach me? I point you back to my earlier assertion: Youth sports is oftentimes nothing less than idolatry in early bloom.

I really don’t know what else to call it. One of the definitions Webster’s Dictionary gives for “idol” is: “Any object of passionate devotion.” Similarly, one of the definitions it gives for “idolatry” is: “Excessive love or veneration for any person or object.” You see, an idol doesn’t have to be a graven image standing in your backyard. It doesn’t have to be a golden statue in the midst of an elaborate temple. An idol can be anything upon which you pour an inordinate amount of time, energy, money, and zeal.

Show me a father who won’t put a dime in the church offering plate but will gladly pay $200 for his kid to have that hot new pair of Nike basketball shoes, and I’ll show you an idol-worshiping father. Show me a mother who won’t volunteer to do anything at church but thinks nothing of working the concession stand at the ballfield or baking cookies for the fundraiser for her child’s soccer team, and I’ll show you an idol-worshiping mother. Even if that father or mother is a Christian, it’s hard to deny that their purest worship goes to youth sports, not to Jesus.

Just as some churches have “children’s church” or “wee worship” to train their children how to worship in the sanctuary with the adults, our society does the same kind of thing with the worship of sports. We use youth leagues to get our children ready to worship at the larger athletic stages. When a child never sees a parent praying but often sees the parent arguing umpires’ calls, the child gets the message: Arguing umpires’ calls is important; prayer isn’t. When a child never sees a parent reading the Bible but the parent knows the league rulebook from A to Z, the child gets the message: Knowing the rulebook is important; knowing the Bible isn’t. Kids aren’t stupid, and they pay more attention than we realize. It doesn’t take them long to figure out where our priorities lie. Once they’ve done this, all they have to do is embrace those same priorities and grow up. That’s how you build adults who worship sports more than Christ.

So, what should you, as the Christian parent of a child involved in youth sports, do about this problem? Let me suggest three things. Bear in mind that I don’t pretend this is an all-inclusive list. I offer it merely as an attempt to help you put on your thinking cap.

First, do an honest-to-goodness self-evaluation and be real as to how big the problem is in your life. Truthfully, I’ve seen some Christian parents who genuinely had youth sports in a right perspective. On the other hand, I’ve seen others who were way out of the banks on this issue. So, where are you? Compare what you do for youth sports to what you do for your Savior. As the old saying goes, the first step is admitting you have a problem.

Second, sit down with your child and ask questions you never ask. “Do you still enjoy playing this sport?” “Are you playing because you want to play or because you think I want you to play?” “Do you dread going to practice or the games?” “Has playing this sport made you happier or sadder?” You might be surprised at the answers you get. Never take away a sport your child enjoys playing, but don’t make the child keep playing if the experience has turned painfully sour. It’s true that kids sometimes need to be pushed, particularly kids who are naturally lazy. But it’s also true that some parents keep their kids playing because to let them quit would be embarrassing to the parents, not the kids.

Third, get your worship back into proper alignment by rededicating yourself to Christ. This will knock youth sports off the throne of your life and give Jesus back His rightful place. If you will make this one big decision, it will take care of so many little decisions. Does Jesus want you to make a fool of yourself by arguing with an umpire? No. Does He want you to pull your child away from church Sunday after Sunday because your travel team plays in weekend tournaments that keep you constantly on the road and out of town? No. Does He want you to make your child keep playing a sport simply because if the child doesn’t keep at it he will never make the high school team? No. You see, once you have rededicated yourself to Jesus, that familiar question, “What would Jesus do?” takes on a whole new importance. If Jesus wouldn’t do something, you shouldn’t do it.

Perhaps by now you’re thinking that I’ve been reading either your mind or your mail. I haven’t. It’s just that, as I said, I know this subject very well. And despite the conclusion you may have already drawn about me, I do understand that sports doesn’t automatically equate to idolatry. Sports is fine when kept within acceptable parameters. For that matter, it can even be a great thing in that it promotes exercise, teaches teamwork, and rewards hard work. It’s only when sports gets taken to the point of fanaticism, craze, and downright absurdity that it becomes idolatry. In that case, it has no place in the life of the Christian.

In the end, I certainly don’t expect our society to repent of its idol-worshiping ways anytime soon. For example, there will still be stadiums full of people, on Sundays at 1:00 p.m., in frigid weather, cheering wildly at Pittsburgh Steelers and Green Bay Packers games this fall. Needless to say, those folks won’t all have just come from Sunday morning church services, either. We Christians, however, must reserve our worship for Jesus. More than that, we must show our kids just how devoted we are to Him. If that involves adjusting our mindset, so be it. If it involves missing a game, so be it. If it involves the extreme of quitting a sport, so be it. We must do whatever is necessary to bring every area our lives, including the area of youth sports, under the lordship of Christ. This won’t just help our kids; it will help us as well. And, after all, aren’t we the ones who are supposed to be molding and shaping them?

Posted in Children, Choices, Christian Liberty, Church Attendance, Discipleship, Family, Fatherhood, God's Will, Idolatry, Motherhood, Parenting, Personal, Priorities, Sports, Worship, Youth | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

What Does the Bible Teach About Divorce & Remarriage?

Posted on September 8, 2009 by russellmckinney

“Marriage” series: (post #9)

Any series on marriage would be lacking if it didn’t address the issue of divorce and remarriage. For one thing, it would pass over an entire category of marriages, a category that has become commonplace in our society. For another, it would omit a fair-sized list of important Bible passages.

What I want to do with this post is build a bridge that will allow us to rightly understand what the Bible teaches about divorce and remarriage. To build this bridge, I’ll use 7 “planks” of truth. Each of these “planks” comes straight from the pages of scripture.

Plank #1: God’s ideal for marriage is one man-one woman till death do they part. This is taught in both the Old Testament (Genesis 2:24, Proverbs 5:18) and the New Testament (Matthew 19:1-6, Ephesians 5:22-33, 1 Corinthians 7:1-5,39). While it’s true that prominent Old Testament characters such as Jacob, David, and Solomon had many wives, it’s also true that such polygamous relationships were never God’s will. He allowed them and even used them to further His purposes, but they were never His ideal. Furthermore, even a casual study of these families will show that polygamy comes with a steep bill. Inevitably, it creates major problems because it evokes great jealousy among the wives and children.

Plank #2: God hates divorce. These are God’s words not mine as they are found in Malachi 2:16. Note that He hates divorce, not the divorcee. If you wonder why God hates divorce, I’m guessing you’ve never been personally touched by it. Typically, it is a gut-wrenching, heartbreaking, devastating ordeal. It is especially hard when children are involved because they get washed over by the tidal wave. For that matter, so do the grandparents, uncles, aunts, in-laws, and other family members. Not only does God hate divorce because of what it does to the husband and wife, He hates it because of what it does to the rest of the family on both sides.

Plank #3: Despite God’s ideal for marriage and His hatred of divorce, He will grant a divorce in certain situations. One situation involves sexual immorality on the part of the husband or wife. Jesus said,

But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery. (Matthew 5:32, 19:9, N.K.J.V., emphasis mine

The Greek word translated as “sexual immorality” in that quote is porneia. It is an umbrella term that covers every form of sexual sin, including adultery (Matthew 5:31-32; 19:9), homosexuality (Jude v.7), and incest (1 Corinthians 5:1). Therefore, God considers all of these sexual sins as legitimate grounds for divorce. Not coincidentally, these sexual sins (as well as the sin of bestiality) were death-penalty offenses under Old Testament law (Leviticus 18:1-30). So, to sum up, if a husband or a wife has any kind of sexual relations outside the marriage, God will grant a divorce to the victimized spouse.

A second situation in which God will grant a divorce involves spousal abandonment. It must be understood, though, that this abandonment is of a highly specific nature. It is a Christian spouse being left (abandoned) by a non-Christian spouse. Writing under the inspiration of God (2 Timothy 3:16), the apostle Paul explained that the Christian is not “under bondage in such cases” (1 Corinthians 7:15).

Plank #4: In any case where God grants a divorce, He also grants the right to remarry, assuming the remarriage is in His will. In 1 Corinthians 7:27-28, Paul writes:

Are you bound (married) to a wife? Do not seek to be loosed (divorced). Are you loosed (divorced) from a wife? Do not seek a wife. But even if you do marry, you have not sinned. (N.K.J.V.)

As for the fact the new marriage should be in God’s will for the person’s life, that is a  standard for any marriage (1 Corinthians 7:39).

Plank #5: Unscriptural divorce creates adultery. If a person gets a divorce on grounds that are not Biblical and then remarries, that remarriage makes the person an adulterer. I realize this is a tough standard, but it’s the one Jesus lays down in Matthew 5:32 and Matthew 19:9.

The specific example Jesus cites in those verses assumes that both the husband and the wife will remarry and consummate their new marriages. God will see those consummations as adultery because in His mind that husband and wife will still be in marriage covenant with each other. To make matters worse, the consummations will also make adulterers of each of the new spouses.

Plank #6: There is forgiveness to be found in Christ for every sin in regards to marriage, divorce, and remarriage. The epistle of 1 John was written to Christians, and it says in 1 John 1:9:

If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. (N.K.J.V.)

That covers the Christian who needs to seek forgiveness of sin in this area. You see, the issue with the Christian is not lost salvation. It is, instead, lost fellowship with the Lord.

But what about the lost person who needs to seek forgiveness of sin in regards to unscriptural divorce and remarriage? Well, truth be told, the lost person is already living under divine condemnation because of all his or her sins. As John 3:18 says:

He who believes in Him (Christ) is not condemned; but he who does not believe is condemned already, because he has not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God. (N.K.J.V.)

Sadly, a lost person’s sin in regards to marriage, divorce, and remarriage is just more unforgiven sin in a lifetime filled with unforgiven sin. He or she doesn’t lose any fellowship with God because there is no fellowship to lose. What the lost person needs more than anything is to believe in Christ as Savior and thereby receive forgiveness of all sins, including the sin of unscriptural divorce and remarriage. God’s word to such a man or woman is:

For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved. (John 3:16-17, N.K.J.V.)

Plank #7: God wants the divorced-remarried person to remain in his or her current marriage (assuming that marriage isn’t some type of “same-sex marriage”). Even if a husband or wife realizes his or her current marriage is adulterous because it came after an unscriptural divorce, God wants that person to stay in the current marriage. He or she shouldn’t end the new marriage in divorce and try to remarry the previous spouse. That will just make a bad situation worse. For scripture to support this position, I will again reference 1 Corinthians 7:27, where Paul writes, “Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be loosed…” Also, the Malachi 2:16 verse where God says He hates divorce would come into play as well.

Alright, now that we have these 7 planks of our bridge in place, we can do a little detail work on the bridge. Here now are 10 “detail” pieces that will help fill in some of the gaps. As was the case with the “planks,” each of these is based upon scripture.

1. God is the only “judge” who can truly grant a divorce. Jesus said, “What God has joined together, let not man separate” (Matthew 19:6). The judge downtown is just a man. He doesn’t have the power to separate a couple that God Himself has joined together. That judge can provide a legal document of divorce, but he can’t make that document stand good in the eyes of God.

2. Even though there are many unscriptural grounds (incompatibility, alcoholism, drug addiction, spousal abuse, child abuse, financial problems, etc.) people deem as worthy for divorce, not one of these is legitimate with God.

3. God does allow husbands and wives in troubled marriages to separate and yet not divorce. This should be remembered especially in marriages in which one of the spouses is truly at physical risk. 1 Corinthians 7:10-11 says: “A wife is not to depart from her husband. But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband…” That word “depart” could include a separation that does not lead to divorce.

4. Even in situations in which God acknowledges Biblical grounds for divorce, He does not demand divorce (1 Corinthians 7:12-14). To the contrary, He might very well be pleased if the couple worked out their problems and made the marriage last.

5. In the Old Testament law God gave to Israel, a man could not divorce his wife and then remarry her again if she got remarried and divorced after he first divorced her (Deuteronomy 24:1-4).

6. Under that Old Testament law, a man could divorce his wife for virtually any reason as long as he provided her with a written certificate of divorcement (Deuteronomy 24:1-4). Centuries later, however, Jesus explained that God allowed this practice merely because of the hardness of the peoples’ hearts. Such divorces were never His will (Matthew 19:4-9).

7. Also under that Old Testament law, a priest could not marry a divorced woman, a widow, a defiled woman, or a harlot (Leviticus 21:14).

8. It is never God’s will for a Christian to marry a lost person (2 Corinthians 6:14-18). The scriptural term for such a marriage is “an unequal yoke.” Unfortunately, though, such marriages do happen. For example, one spouse might become a Christian while the other spouse refuses to do so, or perhaps a lost person might falsely claim to be a Christian long enough to marry a true Christian. Then again, sometimes Christians simply marry people they shouldn’t marry. Regardless of how such a union comes to pass, God wants the Christian to stay in the marriage and make it work. This is clearly taught in 1 Corinthians 7:12-14.

9. It is noteworthy that when Jesus spoke to the Samaritan woman at the well, He said to her, “You have well said, ‘I have no husband,’ for you have had five husbands…” He didn’t say, “In God’s eyes, you are still married to each husband.” Why did Jesus word His conversation this way? It is at least possible that the woman provided each of those five husbands with the God-honored grounds of sexual immorality. If this was the case, God would have granted each of her husbands a divorce, which would have (from God’s viewpoint) left her without a husband.

10. No Christian will have to worry about any eternally lingering effects of marriage, divorce, and remarriage. Jesus taught that there will be no marriage in eternity (Matthew 22:30). The only marriage will be that of the bridegroom, Jesus, to His bride, the church, (Ephesians 5:22-32).

Well, perhaps after reading all of this you feel like you’ve been clubbed to death with the Bible. Even worse, if you are divorced or divorced and remarried, you might feel like a second-class person in the eyes of God. Please don’t do that. Neither unscriptural divorce nor unscriptural divorce and remarriage is the unpardonable sin. There is complete forgiveness to be found in Christ!

More than that, God still wants to use you in wonderful ways in His service. Think about it, if He can use a murderer like Moses (Exodus 2:11-15), an adulterer/murderer like David (2 Samuel 11:1-27), a persecutor like Paul (Galatians 1:13), and a thief dying on a cross (Luke 23:39-43), He can certainly use you.

You say, “But Russell, you don’t know how badly I’ve missed the mark on this topic.” My response would be, “Have you missed it any worse than that Samaritan woman at the well?” She had five failed marriages on her track record and was living with a guy who wasn’t even one of the five (John 4:18). Nevertheless, God used her as one of the greatest examples of witnessing in all the Bible (John 4:28-30,39-42).

Listen, don’t let an unscriptural divorce or an unscriptural divorce and remarriage become the event that stands out as the mountaintop peak of your life. Once you’ve realized the sin in what you’ve done receive the 100% forgiveness that Jesus offers and START AFRESH AND ANEW RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE IN SERVICE TO HIM.

I don’t know if you’ve heard but the Lord is running short on volunteers. If you want to serve Him, He will put you to work! Will you ever forget your bad marriage? No. Will you have to deal with some fallout from it as long as you live? Perhaps. But everyone has things in their past they’d like to forget, and everyone is dealing with some sort of fallout from something. So, give yourself fully over to Christ and get on with your life. Stop living in the past. Realize that in Christ you really can have a joyous present and you really do have a glorious future.

Posted in Divorce, Divorce & Remarriage, God's Will, Homosexuality, Husbands, Marriage, Polygamy, Series: "Marriage", Wives | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

What About Communication in Marriage?

Posted on September 3, 2009 by russellmckinney

“Marriage” series: (post #8)

It’s been said that problems in a marriage don’t become catastrophic until the couple can’t talk about them. It’s also been said that silence is the most frightening sound in any marriage. The Bible certainly gives us many verses that pertain to communication, and they can all be applied to marriage. Consider these (all from the N.K.J.V.):

Psalm 34:13: Keep your tongue from evil, and your lips from speaking deceit.

Psalm 141:3: Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips.

Proverbs 10:11: The mouth of the righteous is a well of life, but violence covers the mouth of the wicked.

Proverbs 10:21: The lips of the righteous feed many, but fools die for lack of wisdom.

Proverbs 12:18: There is one who speaks like the piercings of a sword, but the tongue of the wise promotes health.

Proverbs 13:3: He who guards his mouth preserves his life, but he who opens wide his lips shall have destruction.

Proverbs 15:1: A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.

Proverbs 18:21: Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit.

Proverbs 21:23: Whoever guards his mouth and tongue keeps his soul from troubles.

Proverbs 25:11: A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.

James 3:6: And the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity. The tongue is so set among our members that it defiles the whole body, and sets on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire by hell.

1 Peter 3:10: He who would love life and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips from speaking deceit.

Somewhere along the way, I came across a list of the five levels of communication in marriage. As I name these five, see which one best describes your marriage:

#1: The frivolous level: This kind of communication centers around small talk. It’s just chitchat that has very little depth. For example, a husband says, “It’s cold out there today.” His wife responds, “Yes, it is.”

#2: The factual level: This kind of communication involves the emotionless reporting of facts. A wife says, “The Thompsons bought a new grill.” The husband responds, “Yes, Home Depot is running a sale on grills right now, and they bought it there.” The factual level is little more than a notch above the frivolous level.

#3: The fellowship level: At this level, married couples talk about ideas and philosophies. A wife says, ” Some people strongly believe our nation should never go to war.” Her husband responds, “Yes, Linda at work holds that opinion, but Charlie believes wars sometimes have to be fought to ensure the greater good.” You see, neither spouse has staked out a position on the rights and wrongs of warfare, but the topic of conversation is bigger than anything from the previous two levels.

#4: The feeling level: Here is where spouses really open up and speak in very personal ways. The wife says, “Well, I agree with Linda. Our nation has seen enough war. We need to try pacifism a while.” But the husband responds, “No, Charlie makes the better argument and I’m with him on this issue.” Each spouse has now opened himself or herself up to potential criticism and rejection.

#5: The freedom level: At this highest level of communication, neither spouse holds anything back. Every hope, dream, fear, opinion, belief, etc. is out there on display. There is no worry about being judged, put down, or rejected. Even if one spouse doesn’t agree with the other, there is unconditional love and acceptance.

Always keep in mind that some forms of communicating don’t make for good communication. That list includes: intimidating through temper, taking a superior tone, belittling your spouse, yelling louder than your spouse, talking more than your spouse, and making your spouse feel guilty by means of your crocodile tears. If you are in the habit of wielding any of these weapons when you talk to your spouse, STOP IT. You are killing any chance that your marriage has at reaching the freedom level, that highest level of communication. For that matter, you might very well be killing your marriage.

And here’s one last thought: Communication cannot occur until someone is ready to listen. If your idea of communicating is getting the floor and holding it, your communication skills function at a mere 50% capacity. James 1:19 says: “So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath” (N.K.J.V., emphasis mine) Tell me, how swift are you at hearing? The swifter you are, the better you will be at communication.

Posted in Communication, Husbands, Marriage, Series: "Marriage", The Tongue, Wives | Tagged , , , , | 1 Comment

Why Is Sex So Important in Marriage?

Posted on August 31, 2009 by russellmckinney

“Marriage” series: (post #7)

The fact that our world has turned “sex” into a dirty word is tragic. After all, it was God who designed Adam and Eve to be sexual beings. He made them “male” and “female” and said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply” (Genesis 1:28). And what is the only way humans can multiply? Sex.

Obviously, then, one reason why sex is so important in marriage is procreation. Since many members of the human race die each day, new members must be born if the race is to continue. Procreation through sex was always God’s plan to perpetuate the race, and even Adam and Eve’s sin didn’t change that. The only change their sin produced in regards to procreation was that giving birth became painful for the woman. We hear this in God’s words to Eve: “I will greatly multiply your sorrow and your conception. In pain you shall bring forth children” (Genesis 3:16, N.K.J.V.).

A second reason why sex is so important in marriage is satisfaction. I’m talking now about the satisfying of the natural sex drive. Under the inspiration of God, Paul wrote:

But I say to the unmarried and to the widows: It is good for them if they remain even as I am; but if they cannot exercise self-control, let them marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion. (1 Corinthians 7:8-9, N.K.J.V.)

Clearly, there is nothing wrong with having a sex drive and “passion.” These things are very real parts of being human. But God demands that we meet our sexual needs within the bonds of marriage.

This explains why Paul, earlier in that same seventh chapter of 1 Corinthians, actually forbids a husband and wife from depriving one another of sex. He writes:

It is good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband. Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self control. (1 Corinthians 7:1-5, N.K.J.V.)

No doubt, Paul understood that the “water” Solomon describes in Proverbs 5:15-20 isn’t literal water. Those verses say:

Drink water from your own cistern and running water from your own well. Should your fountains be dispersed abroad, streams of water in the streets? Let them be only your own, and not for strangers with you. Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice with the wife of your youth. As a loving deer and a graceful doe, let her breasts satisfy you at all times. And always be enraptured with her love. For why should you, my son, be enraptured by an immoral woman, and be embraced in the arms of a seductress? (N.K.J.V.)

Furthermore, that wasn’t the only passage in which Solomon, writing every bit as much under the inspiration of God as Paul did, addressed the topic of sex in marriage. The entire book The Song of Solomon (or The Song of Songs) is filled with intimate (sometimes even erotic) passages concerning the joys of romance and sex between a man and wife. For example, in Song of Solomon 4:1-15 and 7:1-7, Solomon gives vivid descriptions of his beautiful wife, the Shulamite, and she returns the favor in Song of Solomon 5:10-16. As we read these passages, it isn’t hard to see that Solomon and the Shulamite were sexually attracted to each other.

Along the same lines, consider these other descriptive passages (all from the N.K.J.V.):

“Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth” (Song of Solomon 1:2).

“While the king is at his table, my spikenard sends forth its fragrance. A bundle of myrrh is my beloved to me that lies all night between my breasts” (Song of Solomon 1:12-13).

“Behold, you are fair, my love! Behold, you are fair! You have dove’s eyes. Behold, you are handsome, my beloved! Yes, pleasant! Also our bed is green” (Song of Solomon 1:15-16).

“By night on my bed I sought the one I love. I sought him, but I did not find him” (Song of Solomon 3:1)

Some people would be astounded to learn that such passages are in the Bible, but God had these words written and preserved to serve a purpose. He wants the world to know that He is very much for sex! It’s just that the sex has to be in accordance with His commandments and standards.

As for what are those commandments and standards are, here is the list:

Premarital sex is a sin.

Adultery is a sin.

Bigamy is a sin.

Polygamy is a sin.

Homosexuality is a sin.

Incest is a sin.

So, again let me say that “sex” isn’t supposed to be a dirty word. Sex only becomes dirty when we ignore God’s boundaries for it and start engaging in it through sinful ways. Not only is sex the God-designed means of propagation for the human race, it is also His outlet for the human sex drive in married couples. When it comes to sex, we only get into sin when we ignore God’s rules and in so doing turn it into something unholy rather than holy.

Posted in Desires, Homosexuality, Husbands, Lesbianism, Marriage, Series: "Marriage", Sex, Wives | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment